Hell

'There is something I wanted to talk to you about.'

'Wait, your tea is getting cold.'

'Ah, don't worry about my tea. There are far more important things than that.'

'Like what?'

'Like these proposals that I have been receiving through the post.'

'What type of proposals?'

'Don't be silly, for your marriage, of course.'

'But how could that be possible when I never asked for any?'

'Well, mother and I put up this matrimonial last month. We thought it was in your best interests not to tell you.'

'But how do you dare to know what my best interests are?'

'Well, I am your father, and a father always knows what is for the best for his daughter. So are you going to look through these?'

'No, I am not.'

'Very well, I thought as much. But if you are planning to go for a fling with one of those college friends of yours, here is something you should remember. He must be a non-Catholic, a non-Protestant, a non-Sikh, a non-Muslim, a non-Buddhist, a non-Jaina, a non-Taoist, a non-Rastafarian, a non-Shintoist, and a non-Confucianist. And as for Hindus, he must be a non-Shaivite.'

'Sigh. This so reminds me of that idiot I knew when I was at school. He used to throw these one-liners at people, with a supreme nonchalance as if he did not care if anyone was listening to him.'

'And what did he say?'

'That for a girl to remain close to her father is the highest compliment she can pay to patriarchy.'