Perhaps you are more or less familiar (though, to understand what follows, the emphasis should fall rather on the more than on the less) with the New Testament's Parable of the Prodigal Son; here is my 'reply' to it in the form of a Parable of the Prodigal Daughter.
And when all the fathers and the mothers of the world were gathered unto him, the Transparent Ironist rose up with a swish of his exquisite robe made of the finest Murshidabad silk, climbed up onto the Mount and thus he spake unto them, with a voice quivering with emotion and with a face radiant with the distant glories of the setting sun (All quotes are from The Gospel According To The Transparent Ironist Chapter 15, Verses 11 - 22) :
11 A certain man in Judaea had two children, an elder son and a younger daughter.
12 And the daughter said to her Father, 'My noble Lord, my dear Father whom I cherish more than the sinews of my miserable heart, givest Thou to me the portion of my inheritance that falleth to me'. And the Father divided unto them His property.
12 And the daughter said to her Father, 'My noble Lord, my dear Father whom I cherish more than the sinews of my miserable heart, givest Thou to me the portion of my inheritance that falleth to me'. And the Father divided unto them His property.
13 And not many days after, as is the wont of impulsive young women, the daughter collected all together her goods, and made her journey into a faraway land, and there spent all her inheritance with riotous living with men from all the nations in the road-side taverns.
14 But soon there arose a great famine in that land; and she began to starve.
15 And she went and joined the farm of a landowner of that country, who sent her into his fields to feed his swine.
16 But she finally came to her senses, of which as a woman she possessed scarcely any, and she lamented, 'How many lowly servants of my own Father's have enough bread to eat, and here I perish with hunger! I will arise and go to my Father, and I will say unto Him, 'Father, I have sinned against the heaven that Thou art, and before Thee, I am no more worthy to be called Thy daughter : make me as one of Thy bonded servants.' And she arose, and came to her Father.
14 But soon there arose a great famine in that land; and she began to starve.
15 And she went and joined the farm of a landowner of that country, who sent her into his fields to feed his swine.
16 But she finally came to her senses, of which as a woman she possessed scarcely any, and she lamented, 'How many lowly servants of my own Father's have enough bread to eat, and here I perish with hunger! I will arise and go to my Father, and I will say unto Him, 'Father, I have sinned against the heaven that Thou art, and before Thee, I am no more worthy to be called Thy daughter : make me as one of Thy bonded servants.' And she arose, and came to her Father.
17 But when she was yet a great way off, her Father saw her, and had compassion, and ran, and kissed her on her neck. And He shouted to His servants, 'Put my ring on her finger, and shoes on her feet: And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill it; and let us eat, and be merry.'
18 Now His elder son was in the field: and as he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard music and dancing. And he called one of the servants, and asked what these things meant. And he said unto him, 'Thy younger sister is come home; and thy Father hath killed the fatted calf, because He hath received her safe and sound'.
18 Now His elder son was in the field: and as he came and drew nigh to the house, he heard music and dancing. And he called one of the servants, and asked what these things meant. And he said unto him, 'Thy younger sister is come home; and thy Father hath killed the fatted calf, because He hath received her safe and sound'.
19 And the son was furious, and would not go in: therefore came his Father out, and intreated him.
20 And he answering said to his Father, 'Lo, these many years do I serve Thee, neither transgressed I at any time Thy commandment: and yet Thou never gavest me a lamb, that I might make merry with my friends : But as soon as this Thy miserable filthy daughter had arrived here, a daughter who hath devoured Thy money by living with countless men under the same roof, Thou hast killed for her the fatted calf!'
21 And He said unto him, 'Son dearest, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine. But do you not see the truth behind my actions? I am just pretending to be happy with thy sister now that she has come back, with the hope that she shall think that I have really taken her back into my heart. But no! I just wish her to feel forgiven, so that from now on I can constantly keep her at my beck and call. A woman who is deceived into feeling forgiven by a man will do anything to keep him happy and will follow him like a dog that runs after its master. And, yes, within a year, after all this dust hath settled, I shall get her married off, and I shall wash my hands off her. This, my Son dearest, is just a little trick of your old Father to ensure that our family honour does not suffer any further disrepute from the shameful acts of your despicable sister.'
20 And he answering said to his Father, 'Lo, these many years do I serve Thee, neither transgressed I at any time Thy commandment: and yet Thou never gavest me a lamb, that I might make merry with my friends : But as soon as this Thy miserable filthy daughter had arrived here, a daughter who hath devoured Thy money by living with countless men under the same roof, Thou hast killed for her the fatted calf!'
21 And He said unto him, 'Son dearest, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine. But do you not see the truth behind my actions? I am just pretending to be happy with thy sister now that she has come back, with the hope that she shall think that I have really taken her back into my heart. But no! I just wish her to feel forgiven, so that from now on I can constantly keep her at my beck and call. A woman who is deceived into feeling forgiven by a man will do anything to keep him happy and will follow him like a dog that runs after its master. And, yes, within a year, after all this dust hath settled, I shall get her married off, and I shall wash my hands off her. This, my Son dearest, is just a little trick of your old Father to ensure that our family honour does not suffer any further disrepute from the shameful acts of your despicable sister.'
22 And He continued, 'It was therefore meet that we should make merry, and be glad: for this thy sister was untamed once, but is civilised now; and was unmarried once, but will soon be married tomorrow'.
And when he had finished with his Sermon, the Ironist came down and slowly walked away into the horizon. Behind him, he could hear the fathers and the mothers of the world speaking to one another in whispers, 'Yes, the Ironist is so right! This is the reason why we should marry off our daughters as soon as possible. He is truly such a great moral teacher. We must come here regularly for his Sunday classes on morality.'
The Ironist sighed to himself : it is easier for a camel to pass through a needle's eye than for irony to pass through the thick skulls of the fathers and the mothers of the world.
1 Comments:
At 17.5.05, Anonymous said…
The Ironist sighed to himself : it is easier for a camel to pass through a needle's eye than for irony to pass through the thick skulls of the fathers and the mothers of the world.
Will nobody escape the irony of the Ironist?
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